"I thought about buying the cat a cat sack. Thought I’d tell you that. closes door"

On why the fuck would you say that to me when I’m drunk and then immediately close the door I can’t stand that cat so why is this relevant information?!

"I wonder what he shits like."

On bear gryllis eating a bug.

"

Wait, there’s a NOTE on one of my ridiculous things?

…oh. I *liked* it.

"

On reading blogs about her.

What?

Elin: Have you ever been to Hartford, Connecticut before?

Me: I think so.

*pause*

Me: Why?

Elin: No reason.

"She looks like a claymation"

On deb from “Dexter”

"…and it’s clear that he has seven muffins in his pants."

On boners.

"He’s someone from something."

On actor recognition.

"Did you post my foreskin yet?"

• on the previous post.

"I’ve had some interesting experiences with foreskin."

On circumcision.